I have this little pocket-sized prayer book I keep with me. It's a very abridged version of Alexander Carmichael's classic tome, Celtic Prayers. Divided into sections such as Prayers and Thanksgiving, Peace, and Creation, I find it a comforting resource to keep with me. This morning I opened up to the "Blessings" section and it occurred to me that this is where I spend the least of my time. It's just that blessings can feel so...selfish.
It's not that I don't want a blessing or to "feel" blessed, but there's somthing odd about asking for a blessing for oneself. It's like asking for money without doing anything for it. That, of course, is a telling statement. Blessings aren't transactions. Grace is only a gift. So I have to ask myself: Am I hardwired to think of everything, even blessings, as a transaction of some kind? Apparently so.
I also don't like to impose...or have anyone in my business without my expressed permission and control. A transaction affords a certain control. Maybe not a lot, but it establishes a sufficient illusion of control. There are limits to a transaction. A blessing is limitless even if momentary.
So, this morning I arise and wonder about control, transactions, imposition, and life with God running wild. Not domesticated. Not transactional, but the free-flowing water of blessing.